A Vacation Poorly Planned

I am suffering from “new teacher hot flashes”. You thought they were only for menopausal women? Think again.

Last year, when I was a push-in, I relished my vacation. It was a surprise to have all this time off and not be the sole person away from the busy office.

While I’m still not used to having these breaks, instead of relaxing, now all I am doing is suddenly realizing all the things I could have brought home to do but didn’t. My day goes by, and my mind makes a mad dash to “where did I put those math tests?!” or “I should have brought home their published writing pieces!”

Sometimes the thoughts rush in just as I’m waking or falling asleep. I’m unconsciously making lists of things I need to do as soon as I get back Monday morning. It’s torture.

I didn’t plan this break very well. I kind of rushed out of the classroom to meet a friend instead of going through everything more carefully. I just imagined myself doing lesson plans and charts over the break.

I can’t even say I’m re-energizing my battery since I’ve spent the last four days recovering from a sinus infection. *sigh* At least Xmas was great!

It’s funny, the folks at Edwize recently asked what some of our new year resolutions were — I should have added “to better prepare for these holiday breaks!” Either by working harder before so I have less “new teacher hot flashes” or by actually bringing home everything I need!

Teacher Tenure

Trying to generate a conversation:

Why do elementary school teachers have tenure?
Why do they deserve a level of job security most other jobs lack?
Please post your comments below.

Here are links to articles that have been feeding my own thinking on the subject (although they largely deal with higher education, which is why I feel a discussion from an elementary teacher perspective would be interesting):

Stanley Fish Underestimates Academic Freedom (from Sept. 2008)

An Authoritative Word on Academic Freedom (from Nov. 2008)

Academic Freedom Is About The Task At Hand (from Dec. 2008)

The Klein Who Stole Tenure (hilarious)

The One to Blame or Thank?

In the hallway, she muttered about teachers who spend too much time cutting out elaborate bulletin-board decorations or chitchatting at “morning meetings” with their third-graders before the real work begins.

This is the problem with so many articles on education for the general public. Most everyday-readers do not know what morning meetings are, and here their purpose is compared to bulletin boards and chitchatting. Yes, it’s a throw-away quote in a sense, used to introduce the person being written about, but it invites the unknowing reader to think, “Oh, yeah, she must be a no-nonsense woman who has some good, controversial ideas I might like – that call for ‘real work’.”

The “she” in that quote is Michelle Rhee, the Chancellor of Education, and the quote is from a brief piece Time magazine published on her last month, making me aware of her name and existence for the first time. And I must say, the article left me uneasy. Not simply because of Rhee’s beliefs and approaches but more so because of the article itself. Rhee is portrayed as a rebel, and her ideas are constantly pitted against teachers in an oversimplified “heroic” way.

There’s always this morality play that unfolds in articles like this – the veteran teachers who just want to love the kids and let them do arts and crafts because she instinctively knows what’s better, and the ambitious, research-focused and data-driven authority who is trying to save students from a “touchy-feely” education.

In my first read of the article, I drew the conclusion that it is the kind of philosophy she espouses that has landed so many of our public schools in this factory-producing-the-best-products approach to education that is deadening and sickening. A philosophy that demands teachers differentiate but then re-mold the students through undifferentiated standards and standardized tests that insist on and reinforce inequality and setting students up for failure. And then giving raises or pink slips to teachers based on those same test scores.

Back to the quote above.

But they said it’d get easier…!

Just about the time you’ve gained a good grasp of your subject matter and your assignment’s vast scope, and your little webbed feet are kicking up a storm underwater where nobody else can see them, you’re also hit by the disturbing awareness that your job has not gotten any easier.

Teacher Professional Development Sourcebook: Embracing Your Practice

Learning From Mistakes Only Works After Age 12, Study Suggests

“Eight-year-old children have a radically different learning strategy from twelve-year-olds and adults. Eight-year-olds learn primarily from positive feedback (‘Well done!’), whereas negative feedback (‘Got it wrong this time’) scarcely causes any alarm bells to ring.”

Learning From Mistakes Only Works After Age 12, Study Suggests.

I just knew I should be using positive reinforcement more! Argh!

What’s funny (or sad), is that plenty of people don’t learn from mistakes after age 12 either!!

drained

My mentor recommended giving more jobs and encouraging more independence among the students as a way of gaining greater control. So, I implemented a Homework Monitor who has to check and see if everyone at their table (they sit in groups of 4 and 5) have done their homework. Then, I come and check who did it all and they get a check on a chart on their desk. It worked remarkably smoothly this morning.

One new detail to the Table Monitor job did not work so well. I told them it was now also their job to keep everyone working either in silence or using their library voices. This did not seem to help much. Maybe tomorrow.

respect and logic

I was feeling really frustrated the other day because two veteran teachers who were in my room ended up yelling at my kids to stop talking. That’s really the only way, or the main way, they “misbehave”. I was so embarrassed because I felt their actions reflect on me. I started to agonize over whether the rules, routines, and procedures I had established weren’t having the effect they’re supposed to and what I was/am doing wrong.

But the bigger struggle I have been having, is while I want a classroom that is full of kids passionate about learning and who follow the rules because they know it helps them to learn, I don’t want to be a drill sergeant. It’s not my style. Some may see it as a strength and some may see it as not belonging in the classroom, but I have a lot of respect for kids – their desire to ask questions, play, laugh, discover and try out. I don’t want a classroom that is silent. I have English Language Learners (ELLs) and I want them to talk – to sort out their problems orally and learn how to discuss their problems.

So I realize what I need is to focus more on allowing them to respect me and each other easily, and to learn HOW we talk in a classroom. And I need to find more ways to be better prepared so that lessons are more engaging and they reach kids from different angles and, on the one hand, lessens the language obstacles, and on the other, teaches them the language they need.

My thinking was sparked in part by finding loveandlogic.com, and while I don’t know enough to say I agree with their approach totally, I do like their list of classroom expectations:

(I combined two different lists from their site to make it like this)

1. I teach when there are no distractions or other problems.

2. I listen to students who raise their hand.

3. I listen to one person at a time.

4. Please treat me with the same respect I treat you.

5. If someone causes a problem, I will ask them to fix it.

• If they can’t or will not fix it, I will do something.

6. What I do will depends on what happened and what the person is willing to do to solve the problem.

This really speaks to the side of me that respects kids and wants to see them grow as responsible members of a community, and sees that they already have that potential. I like how it is written with emphasis on the teacher and uses positive language. NO ONE in my school, from what I can tell, uses this approach.

All Eyes On Me

1, 2, 3… So many people are observing me. As a new teacher, my supervisor needs to formally observe me 4 times. That doesn’t count any informal observations. As a NYCT fellow and masters candidate, my consultant/professor/advisor also needs to observe me (twice a month). And, lastly, my principal needs to observe me at least once. I feel like a window display.

And then in a few weeks we have the Quality Review people coming. I agree with Ms. M that these things should be a surprise – observations included – to keep people on their toes and not simply preparing a scripted performance. When I was a TV producer, you weren’t “observed” in the way teachers are, but you were constantly in the line of fire — at any minute, you would need to track down key information about a trial, get a high-profile attorney on the phone, or be aware of any upcoming hearings that might be newsworthy. You and your work were always on display, and if you messed up, millions of viewers would see your mistakes. Maybe your name wouldn’t be attached to it for the audience, (or sometimes it is, as with Dan Rather), but the people who held the ax over your head certainly knew who was responsible. Why is it any different for teachers?

Great or Small, Sometimes Expectations Are Just F*ng Wrong

The NYCTF’s training really sets you up with low expectations of schools and high expectations for your students (even if they’re not ready to meet them yet, which is kinda the point). They drill you with an understanding that kids fail when teachers fail to expect tremendous leaps from them, or prepare them to make those leaps. It’s the teachers who make or break a classroom of students who are working hard to excel. I know a lot of people disagree with this philosophy, but it’s one I still tend to agree with (even if administrators also have a heavy hand in what teachers can and can’t do). Soooo, when I first got hired, I was pretty much expecting to be trying to lift up a school by my bloodied fingertips. I expected meager resources, mismanaged classes, and long hours lesson planning at home. Those expectations were, gladly, not really met.

However, what I wasn’t expecting was a school where teachers were actually reticent towards allowing an ESL teacher into their classrooms because it “disrupts classroom management” and is “just one more thing to think about”; a school where the politics of dealing with territorial teachers is more stressed-out-chocolate-binge-inducing than lesson-planning is; a school where, despite the majority of English Language Learners, so many classroom teachers are willfully ignorant of the needs of ELLs and strategies they could be implementing; the unprofessionalism of many teachers (it made me grateful for my more corporate background); and the lack of in-depth collaboration between teachers.

I was surprised at how many teachers boast about how they’re basically not meeting the standards the school has set, or are sooo far behind and blame all this on the students, and they’re doing this in front of people who really shouldn’t be hearing that (like a representative of Teachers College)! Or how many of them gloat about how they look forward only to their preps, lunch, and vacation time. Or how they make fun of their students (and, in doing so, further expose their ignorance of people learning a language for the first time, not to mention ignorance of their special ed students as well).

I complained when I worked for television. My job felt purposeless, boring, rote, and degrading. Sometimes I felt like I was doing something meaningful or important. Rarely.

But as a teacher, you work with kids! That in and of itself should always make your job feel purposeful! Yes, it can suck but we’re talking about kids! Maybe I sound naive, but this is coming from someone who didn’t even like kids before I started working here. On top of that, this job lets you be a scientist, experimenting on theories and ideas, and an artist; a leader and explorer, etc!

Seriously -how can you be a teacher and decide you don’t need to learn anymore about how children learn? Or ask yourself why a student answered the question so “bizarrely” rather than just show the work to other teachers, remarking how stupid your student is?

*I have to note that there are a lot of awesome things about my school and I feel really lucky to be there. But it has its skeletons as well – as do I!

Teaching is like highway driving

Imagine this.

You are in a small car hurtling down the highway. There are so many cars whizzing past you that you don’t know how there isn’t a traffic jam. 85 mph and you’re often trying to change lanes, so you’re looking in all mirrors, trying to keep an appropriate distance from the car in front you, and trying to avoid your blind spots.

As poor an analogy as it may be, that’s what teaching feels like to me right now – you are constantly trying to remain intently aware of a million very important things all around you in an environment with super high stakes. And these things have to be carefully managed together — you can’t do only one thing well. Like differentiating, grouping, meeting the standards and the ESL modalities, assessing, planning, etc. And so much can change — suddenly and drastically — and be lost. And it’s all on you.