Full Potential

As I walked upstairs to the third floor, carrying everything I needed for each class I visited, I began to wonder: am I working to my full potential? Of course not, but am I at least on the right path to get there?

I recently completed my first month as a new ESL teacher. I had no prior experience in an elementary school setting (and not even real experience with kids this age), so I have really been learning a lot. And, to be honest, it was really hard to even admit that to myself because I set very high, maybe unrealistic goals for myself, including how fast I expect myself to learn.

Only recently – this past Friday to be exact – did I really allow myself to consider how much I have learned. I was having dinner with another teacher (A Fellow that I had trained with at the high school where I was a student teacher briefly) catching up on where we now were, where we’d be doing our Masters, etc., and I was describing some of my students to her. I was describing some of the things good readers do at the elementary level – like using their finger as they read and making connections between the words and pictures. I had an out-of-body experience in that moment because I was finally conscious of what I’d been learning! I had been feeling like I barely had time to create lesson plans, never mind step back and really see what I was doing.

I often feel so lost and confused, but this is so unlike just having a new job. I’ve had new jobs where I had to quickly learn how to interview a market analyst or a prominent attorney with little preparation — but I always had my skills and experience to rely on. As a new teacher, yes I apply strategies and skills from my background as a journalist, but this really is just a whole new way of thinking and doing. So, I usually feel like I’m working from the seat of my pants, hoping that what I’m doing is not just right, but good.

What does it even mean to reach your full potential? I know that’s something that requires time, but I think a lot about whether or not I’m reaching kids and being effective. I know – I haven’t even been here 2 months and I’m already worried I’m being ineffective. My AP told me in passing that she believes a good teacher is good in any environment, but she has never been a push-in teacher, which has a lot of its own quirks and difficulties.

As a push-in teacher, I’m constantly having to deal with the atmospheres created by the classroom teacher. Sometimes it can be great – four out of 8 of the teachers I work with are enthusiastic and I’d say two are understanding toward the uniqueness of their students (even if they don’t really know how to work with ELLs). But most really are not that interested and are much more inclined to see ELLs as “difficult” and bad students. They’re condescending and impatient toward them, and clearly not that interested in learning how to better serve this population (I’m mainly talking here about the ones who’ve been teaching for eight years who never bothered to take one course on teaching ELLs). When I go into those classrooms, it’s hard not feeling completely discouraged because I’m only with the kids for 1 period a day. As soon as I leave, I feel like all my work gets sabotaged (not intentionally). I really don’t feel like I’m having a lasting impression.

I mean, it’s true – it’s only been a month and really within that, just 2 weeks of having a rhythm with the schedule. Lasting impressions may take a little longer.

But I’m already hungry to be effective and to feel like I’m at least heading toward my full potential.

Suggested Reading

This article addresses exactly how I’ve been feeling..

Teaching is like highway driving

Imagine this.

You are in a small car hurtling down the highway. There are so many cars whizzing past you that you don’t know how there isn’t a traffic jam. 85 mph and you’re often trying to change lanes, so you’re looking in all mirrors, trying to keep an appropriate distance from the car in front you, and trying to avoid your blind spots.

As poor an analogy as it may be, that’s what teaching feels like to me right now – you are constantly trying to remain intently aware of a million very important things all around you in an environment with super high stakes. And these things have to be carefully managed together — you can’t do only one thing well. Like differentiating, grouping, meeting the standards and the ESL modalities, assessing, planning, etc. And so much can change — suddenly and drastically — and be lost. And it’s all on you.

Be The Kid

Recently the ESL Department at my school had our first (since I’ve been there) departmental meeting with our supervisor. In the lead up to it, the veteran teachers groaned and warned about how “there’s always something” and were not looking forward to it. I didn’t really know what to expect.

As you may know by now, NYC Public Schools now receive a progress report that rates a school for the percentage of progress students make. Our school scored an A, and this meeting discussed some of the weaknesses and where we, as a school, needed to improve. One was in terms of data, so now we have to carry around the most recent running record for our students, for example.

Our supervisor also detailed some ideas she’d gotten from going for some professional development with Teachers College, with which our school is affiliated. One of the things was the suggestion to “be the kid” — during a read aloud that the classroom teacher is doing, rather than being in the front of the classroom, sometimes we should sit down with the kids and get a better sense of how they’re seeing/hearing/interpreting/discussing things. The other new teacher (more on her later) and I were really jazzed by this. The veterans were kind of like, “more work?”

This seems to be an essential question and crossroads for what kind of teacher I will become. It comes down to why someone I am a teacher and where I see myself in this career.

Bloom’s and ELLs

I’m sure for most of you Bloom’s Taxonomy is nothing new, but as someone new to pedagogy/the science behind teaching, it’s really thought-provoking (no pun intended). I really appreciate the way it classifies thinking and levels it — along with looking at learning styles, Bloom’s Taxonomy helps me to assess whether I’m appropriately challenging my students, and if I’m doing it in an academically-sound way and in more than one way. So, here’s an article I’d like to share.

I was actually thinking about it in kind of a spontaneous way today. I was doing guided reading with one group in one of my 1st grade classes, and I realized the book we were reading was probably too low for them, so I quickly had them work with me on creating a Venn Diagram. The book was called What Animals Do, and had things like, “A kangaroo hops.” As they were reading, they were already calling out things like, “I can swim (like the crocodile)!”So, when they were all done and we discussed the book, we listed what animals do that people can’t (like fly or slither) in one circle, what people do that animals can’t do (cute example: share snacks), and then in the center were things they both could do (like swim). I was excited at how quickly they got the concept of the Venn Diagram – including one student who has great phonemic awareness but is still in the Silent Period of language acquisition and speaks 99.9% in Spanish.

What are some great ways you’ve surprised yourself, using Bloom’s Taxonomy in your class?